On Aging

Everyone gets older, if they're lucky, but many people dislike the idea.

I wonder why? Oh, I've heard all the arguments about the deterioration of the body and the mind, and I'm not going to dispute that, but I think that there are aspects to aging that are ignored to the detriment of everyone who must do so (that is, age).

I have this idea which I got from a Life in Hell strip with Will and Abe. I looked for link but I couldn't find one. Because you are so enterprising, I'm sure you can find it for yourself. In it, one of the boys is having his fifth (or fourth) birthday and his brother tells him all the new things that are waiting for him. It is a simple idea, but it made an impression on me.

We, as humans, have various abilities and powers. Each stage of our lives gives us new ones. Many of these are simple-seeming, such as being able to choose your own bedtime or buy your own food or clothes, or they may seem abstract, like being able to look across broader stretches of time, but they all have value.

One young woman whom I spoke to said she did not want to get older because she enjoyed dancing in clubs now (at 17) and that she would not be able to when she was older. Without calling her foolish, I asked her if she enjoyed dancing in clubs when she was 6; she said no. I asked if she had wanted to dance in clubs at that age; again, no. Her life had not been empty due to a dearth of clubbing; it had been focused on other things. I suggested that when she turns 30, she will have gained a new set of interests that may be even more compelling than clubbing. The change is not a loss.

I believe that each age affords us a set of abilities that grant us access to the world and experience; as we grow, we gain new abilities to explore. The old ones we often leave behind, and this is something of a shame, particularly when we forget.

Although I'm not being totally literal about this, I believe that we have access to the abilities that we had as infants, abilities that include a sense of shameless curiosity, and the power of first experience. In my view, an adult, a true adult, is someone who has full access to and control of all of their abilities from all of the various stages of their life. This is something that I hope to achieve.